© Copyright 2017 Rob Brezsny
ARIES (March 21-April 19): You wouldn’t expect a five-year-old child to paint a facsimile of Picasso’s Guernica or sing Puccini’s opera, La Boheme. Similarly, you shouldn’t fault your companions and you for not being perfect masters of the art of intimate relationships. In fact, most of us are amateurs. We may have taken countless classes in math, science, literature, and history, but have never had a single lesson from teachers whose area of expertise is the hard work required to create a healthy partnership. I mention this, Aries, because the next seven weeks will be an excellent time for you to remedy this deficiency. Homework assignments: What can you do to build your emotional intelligence? How can you learn more about the art of creating vigorous togetherness?
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In accordance with the astrological omens, I invite you to slow down and create a wealth of spacious serenity. Use an unhurried, step-by-step approach to soothe yourself. With a glint in your eye and a lilt in your voice, say sweet things to yourself. In a spirit of play and amusement, pet and pamper yourself as you would a beloved animal. Can you handle that much self-love, Taurus? I think you can. It’s high time for you to be a genius of relaxation, attending tenderly to all the little details that make you feel at ease and in love with the world.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “If an angel were to tell us something of his philosophies, I do believe some of his propositions would sound like 2 x 2 = 13.” So said the German scientist Georg Christoph Lichtenberg (1742-1799). Now maybe you don’t believe in the existence of angels, and so you imagine his idea doesn’t apply to you. But I’m here to tell you that an influence equivalent to an angel will soon appear in your vicinity. Maybe it’ll be a numinous figure in your dreams, or a charismatic person you admire, or a vivid memory resurrected in an unexpected form, or a bright fantasy springing to life. And that “angel” will present a proposition that sounds like 2 x 2 = 13.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): Unless you have an off-road vehicle, you can’t drive directly from North America to South America. The Pan-American Highway stretches from Prudhoe Bay in Northern Alaska to Ushuaia, Argentina — a distance of about 19,000 miles — except for a 100-mile patch of swampy rainforest in Panama. I’d like to call your attention to a comparable break in continuity that affects your own inner terrain, Cancerian — a grey area where two important areas of your life remain unlinked. The coming weeks will be a favorable time to close the gap.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Based in Korea, Samsung is a world leader in selling smartphones and other information technology. But it didn’t start out that way. In its original form, back in 1938, it primarily sold noodles and dried fish. By 1954, it had expanded into wool manufacturing. More than three decades after its launch as a company, it further diversified, adding electronics to its repertoire. According to my reading of the astrological omens, the next ten months should be an excellent time for you to do the equivalent of branching out from noodles and dried fish to electronics. And the coming six weeks will be quite favorable for formulating your plans and planting your seeds.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In my opinion, you’re not quite ready to launch full-tilt into the rebuilding phase. You still have a bit more work to do on tearing down the old stuff that’s in the way of where the new stuff will go. So I recommend that you put an “Under Construction” sign outside your door, preferably with flashing yellow lights. This should provide you with protection from those who don’t understand the complexity of the process you’re engaged in.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): You’re a good candidate for the following roles: 1. a skeptical optimist who is both discerning and open-minded; 2. a robust truth-teller who specializes in interesting truths; 3. a charming extremist who’s capable of solving stubborn riddles; 4. a smooth operator who keeps everyone calm even as you initiate big changes; 5. an enlightened game-player who reforms or avoids games that abuse beauty’s power.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Actress and author Carrie Fisher wrote three autobiographies. Speed skating Olympics star Apolo Anton Ohno published his autobiography at age 20. The rascal occultist Aleister Crowley produced an “autohagiography.” To understand that odd term, keep in mind that “hagiography” is an account of the life of a saint, so adding “auto” means it’s the biography of a saint penned by the saint himself. I’m bringing up these fun facts in hope of encouraging you to ruminate at length on your life story. If you don’t have time to write a whole book, please take a few hours to remember in detail the gloriously twisty path you have trod from birth until now. According to my reading of the astrological omens, the best way to heal what needs to be healed is to steep yourself in a detailed meditation on the history of your mysterious destiny.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): If you go to the Historical Museum of the Palatinate in Germany, you will see a jug of wine that was bottled in 1687. In accordance with astrological omens, Sagittarius, I suggest that you find a metaphorical version of this vintage beverage — and then metaphorically drink it! In my opinion, it’s time for you to partake of a pleasure that has been patiently waiting for you to enjoy it. The moment is ripe for you to try an experience you’ve postponed, to call in favors that have been owed to you, to finally do fun things you’ve been saving for the right occasion.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): If a late-night TV talk show called and asked me to be a guest, I’d say no. If People magazine wanted to do a story on me, I’d decline. What good is fame like that? It might briefly puff up my ego, but it wouldn’t enhance my ability to create useful oracles for you. The notoriety that would come my way might even distract me from doing what I love to do. So I prefer to remain an anonymous celebrity, as I am now, addressing your deep self with my deep self. My messages are more valuable to you if I remain an enigmatic ally instead of just another cartoony media personality. By the way, I suspect you’ll soon face a comparable question. Your choice will be between what’s flashy and what’s authentic; between feeding your ego and feeding your soul.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): A Canadian guy named Harold Hackett likes to put messages in bottles that he throws out into the Atlantic Ocean from his home on Prince Edward island. Since he started in 1996, he has dispatched over 5,000 missives into the unknown, asking the strangers who might find them to write back to him. To his delight, he has received more than 3,000 responses from as far away as Russia, Scotland, and West Africa. I suspect that if you launch a comparable mission sometime soon, Aquarius, your success rate wouldn’t be quite that high, but still good. What long-range inquiries or invitations might you send out in the direction of the frontier?
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Intensify” is one of your words of power these days. So are “fortify,” “reinforce,” and “buttress.” Anything you do to intensify your devotion and focus will be rewarded by an intensification of life’s gifts to you. As you take steps to fortify your sense of security and stability, you will activate dormant reserves of resilience. If you reinforce your connections with reliable allies, you will set in motion forces that will ultimately bring you help you didn’t even know you needed. If you buttress the bridge that links your past and future, you will ensure that your old way of making magic will energize your new way.