We all have our own unique personal relationship with food.  The taste, smell, and texture of food can elicit strong images not just of eating food but also  of who we were with and of the place and setting. Food is a trigger of deeper memories of powerful feelings and emotions. We develop belief systems around food that often doesn’t serve us well especially when we try to make “healthier” changes to our diet.

When we feel we have control we tend to be happy.   However, what happens when you try to diet and think you “fail?”.  Usually we become very self-critical and say things to ourself like, “I should be eating this way instead”, or “I shouldn’t have eaten this” or “I’m such a failure that I can’t stick with this” or usually we say “what’s wrong with me”.   Then we judge ourselves harshly and beat ourselves up all over our food choices!  This ongoing sense of “failing” and “self-criticism” is significant and why many people experience a yo-yo diet and why it is so challenging to maintain a weight loss program.

Food Can Represent Healing & Happiness


Your relationship to food is a wonderful opportunity to heal and change your negative mindset. Start out by being kind to yourself regardless of your “performance” with your diet.  We can only do the best we can with what we have and with the level of stress in our life.  If you feel like you “failed” to meet your standards of eating, always give yourself a break.  ALWAYS!  Then the key to healing is awareness. We can’t heal that which we don’t understand.  Awareness allows you to create some distance between you and your initial reaction.   Begin to forgive yourself, give yourself GRACE and move on.  Eventually your negative reaction to food will be less and less and you will make different food choices.  There will be times you make ones you don’t like but you will become accepting of your choices.

As you watch your relationship to food, you learn to be more of an observer and you “choose”  foods rather than feeling like I “have to eat this” or “I can’t eat that”.  As you train your brain and your perception around food you will start being happier, reinforce positive choices, be more proactive and actually make healthier choices.

Let Go.  Enjoy Food.  Enjoy Your Life.

Rigidity around food is a powerful metaphor for fixed behavior in other aspects of your life. Food is an opportunity to learn ways to let go and not need so much control.  Watch what happens in your life when you practice this simple principle.

When you work on loving yourself first, regardless of your behaviors,  you’ll automatically do the best you can and focus on not beating yourself up. If you eat the cake, don’t shower yourself with guilt about how you failed.  Accept it, give yourself GRACE and start over.

Choosing to enjoy the experience of eating creates an energy that carries into other areas of your life. You get to practice this daily (since we get to eat daily). When you sit down to a meal be relaxed and enjoy every delicious bite.  Stay focused on food as a CHOICE, not a have to, and you’ll react less, think more clearly, and have a higher chance of sticking to the diet you choose.

If low carb, keto or paleo ways of eating interest you for getting healthy and/or weight loss set up a free 30 minute coaching call with me.  We’ll look at various food options, mindset, and complete customization so the food plan is designed to work for you.

About Michelle Keto:

Michelle Borthwick, known more widely as Michelle Keto, is the foremost expert in living the Keto lifestyle and the go-to coach for Keto women. She loves the CA lifestyle and spends time between San Diego and Palm Springs, CA. Her 1:1 coaching, and group programs have helped hundreds of women from 25 states and 4 countries lose over 7,500 pounds while eating foods they love. This foodie’s motto, and business name, is “Keto is Easy” and she’s one of the only Keto leaders who promotes full customization for long term success.  For a complimentary 30-minute coaching call please schedule at: