By Bronwyn Ison
Three of the most challenging phrases to communicate to another human being are “I love you, I’m sorry, and I need help.” Each of us has allowed these words to escape our lips and yet they are still difficult to utter repeatedly. When we use these words it positions us in a vulnerable space and thus creates fear. Fear holds us back from our greatest potential. Each phrase has the power to set you free if you can simply speak these words.
Why is saying, “I love you” difficult? Perhaps you grew up in a home with emotionally distance parents. Hence, making it difficult to express your feelings towards another.
Or, it’s possible you have been hurt before and fear rejection. When saying, “I love you,” we anticipate reciprocation. When these words are not shared in return we become reticent. We begin to add more bricks to our wall for fear of future rejection. Research has shown, the more you talk about love, the more you express it and the more you will feel it. And, if you are in love … share you thoughts with your partner or spouse. It will soon become second nature and you will not fear.
Why is saying, “I’m sorry” difficult? First we are admitting fault. Nobody wants to admit they are wrong. Admitting to a mistake makes us feel unworthy. We also misconstrue that if we admit our faults it is a sign of weakness. Unfortunately our pride takes precedence over rationality. Plus, the phrase, “I’m sorry,” is loosely used in our society. Because these words are so powerfully important they should only be shared with candor. The ability to say, “I’m sorry” says many things about a person. One: they are taking responsibility for their actions. Two: they understand and appreciate they caused pain to another person. Lastly, they are remorseful for their actions.
Why is saying, “I need help” difficult? Requesting assistance from others such as colleagues, friends, or family is something many people have trouble doing. Why? The primary reason … we fear looking weak, needy or incompetent to others. Some people are so leery of asking for help that they will sit around on a project for weeks and never accomplish or fulfill the task to it’s fullest potential. We also fear surrendering control. We are not meant to do everything on our own. We need others to assist. While you may have many talents a friend may have just the right ingredients in their tool bag to help a project along. We also fear that the person you are asking may try to dominate. While we may fear asking for help… Each of us needs help. No one is successful as an individual.
I love you, I’m sorry and I need help may provoke a myriad of emotions, thoughts, and feelings. Consider utilizing these phrases within your dialog. You will likely feel a miraculous shift in your life.
Bronwyn Ison is the Owner of Evolve Yoga. www.e-volveyoga.com 760.564.YOGA
