By Haddon Libby
You know who I hate?
Motorists.
Not all motorists – just the ones who go half the speed limit in the left lane. The left lane is for passing…move on over.
You know what else I hate?
Pre-existing conditions.
How can a condition be if it does not exist? That phrase makes no sense! Why not just call it a condition?
Want to know what makes me crazy?
If I say, ‘thank you’ to you for a service rendered, what would you say in return? If you were to say, ‘no problem’ then I hate you. Okay, I don’t really hate you but please try and respond with the phrase ‘you are welcome’ or ‘you’re welcome’. Either will do.
You know who I like?
Aldi.
Want to know why?
Not only can I get a dozen eggs for 79 cents but I get to put a quarter in a slot so that I can use a shopping cart.
Candidly, I’m troubled by the mislabeling of food products. Want an example? Dog food. Want to know why? There is no dog in it. (Note to dog lovers: replace the word ‘dog’ with ‘cat’ and this joke is infinitely funnier.)
I have a love/hate relationship with carbohydrates like bread, cake, cookies, pasta and rice. I even found out that beans have carbs…which is just wrong…gassy and carb’d up? While carbs seem to be as addictive as heroin, they make me fat and bloated. As such, I’ve turned to a diet of fat, meat, protein and coffee from which I have lost nearly 20 pounds over the last three months. In celebration, I’ll be going on amazon.com shortly to buy a defibrillator.
I also hate leaf blowers, edge trimmers and vacuums. If they can make a silencer for a gun, surely someone can do something about these public nuisances.
Speaking of public nuisances, cable news is dead to me. Whether it is Fox, MSNBC or CNN, all they offer are biased talking heads intent of misinforming us.
Whether you like our current President or not, he is on to something when it comes to the veracity of cable news. I would guess that he can spot fake news in the same way that I can spot investment advisors who take advantage of their clients’ trust.
Personally, I like those unscrupulous investment advisors and brokerage firms who overcharge their clients and put them in bad investments.
Want to know why I like them?
It makes my job so much easier. I manage investments for people and businesses and it is so much easier to get an investor to leave those bad firms once someone like me shines a light on their questionable practices.
As a word of advice, if your investment firm has you in mutual funds, structured notes, annuities or some insurance product, come see me. I promise to do my best to make you angry.
You know who I like?
Father Lincoln over at Sacred Heart Church and School. Whether you are Catholic or not, there are few people whom I have ever met who sincerely put their entire being into helping others. The Coachella Valley is a far better place because of him.
Like Father Lincoln, there are so many people in our community whom we should all be thankful for. You know who many of them are. They do the little things that garner little to no attention yet make your life and our community better. Next time that you think of one of those local unsung heroes, send them a note or email expressing your thanks for their presence in your life. Too often we all focus on the people and things that we dislike and do not give sufficient thanks and praise to the truly good people.
Haddon Libby is a Financial Advisor and Managing Director of Winslow Drake Investment Management and can be reached at 760-449-6349 or via www.WinslowDrake.com.
