By Julie Buehler
The only thing more confusing than this early NFL season is how and why some dude ran across the White House lawn and made his way to the East Room. Silly man, the kitchen is on the West Wing. If he was looking for a sandwich, he was in the wrong place.
Good news for you: You’re in the right place. We’ve got a look at how crazy the first 4 weeks of this NFL season have been. Grab the salami and slap some extra mayo down… this could get messy.
There are 2 unbeaten teams in the NFL right now.
The Cincinnati Bengals and the Arizona Cardinals.
The Cards beat the Chargers who beat the Seahawks who beat the Broncos who beat the Colts who blew up the Titans who took out the Chiefs who hammered the Patriots who destroyed the Vikings who beat the Rams who took out the Bucs who just won their first game of the season over the Steelers who steamrolled the Panthers who beat the Lions who’s defense scored more than the Packers offense and beat Green Bay in week 3 who turned around and beat the Bears for it’s 700th franchise win.
The Bears came back to beat the Niners who are the only team have beaten the Eagles who beat the Redskins handily who beat the Jacksonville Jaguars which is one of 2 teams that don’t have a win through 4 weeks of the season.
The other team, the Oakland Raider fired their coach Dennis Allen after getting beaten by the Dolphins who lost to the Bills who got beat by the Texans who lost to the Giants who got beat by the Lions who just beat the Jets who have lost 3 straight to NFC North teams and now take on the Chargers in San Diego. The Chargers used to have a running back named Michael Turner who played for the Atlanta Falcons who lost to the Bengals who haven’t lost to anyone this season.
And yes, I just mentioned all 32 teams in the NFL. And yes, feel free to email my boss and request a raise for me. I agree; it’s overdue and well deserved.
Anyway, if you think it’s odd that through 4 weeks of NFL action, no team is 4-0, as the Cards and Bengals were off this past week and 3-0, you’d be correct.
Only once since 2003 has the NFL failed to deliver at least two 4-0 teams. In fact, at this point last year, there were five 4-0 teams and all of them made the playoffs, two of them played in the Super Bowl.
Other Thoughts From The First 4 Weeks:
Let’s talk about what happened in Dallas for Sunday Night Football.
Jason Garrett outcoached Sean Payton.
Read that again.
The guy who was too smart to be a football coach out coached the guy who wasn’t smart enough to be anything but a football coach. There wasn’t any voodoo necessary for New Orleans to get its butt beat, the Cowboys ran the football. And it worked brilliantly. Plus, the Saints miss Darren Sproles more than they could imagine. They’re lost right now without him.
Monday Night was an impressive display of artful play calling by Kansas City’s head coach Andy Reid. As Reid went Picasso for the nation to admire, Bill Belichick looked like a toddler with 3 crayons drawing on a wall.
The Packers beat the Bears. Badly, thus proving, Jay Cutler will always be Jay Cutler and Aaron Rodgers will always be Aaron Rodgers. And it doesn’t matter how many times Robin does good, he’ll always be in Batman’s shadow. So goes the NFC North.
And I’ve decided, the Steelers don’t know what they’re doing. It’d be like me trying to teach high school chemistry. At first it might be cool, but then it’d become comically bad. They’re there now.
The Colts look awesome, Andrew Luck is just fun to watch. Every week.
And I made it through another column WITHOUT mentioning Johnny Manziel. So thank you for sending that email about my raise.
There’s still so much football to be played and many more surprises to come!
Julie Buehler hosts the Coachella Valley’s most popular sports talk radio show, “Buehler’s Day Off” every day from 3-6 on 1010 KXPS, the valley’s all sports station. She can also be seen every morning between 6-7am on KMIR sharing the coolest stories in sports. She’s an avid gym rat, slightly sarcastic and more likely to recite Steve Young’s career passing stats than American Idol winners. Tune in M-F 3-6 pst at www.team1010.com or watch “Buehler’s Day Off” on Ustream and KMIR.com for her sports reports.
