By Sunny Simon
I woke up around 3:00am in a cold sweat. As I gained my bearings and shook off the remnants of a bad dream, the happenings of the previous day came flooding back to me. Darn! In a vulnerable moment, I made an extremely unwise decision. I agreed to accept a volunteer leadership position. Sure, I could do the job, but it would take a significant amount of time that I did not have. It suddenly occurred to me that it was possible to rescind my acceptance, after all only 24 hours had passed. Sighing deeply I knew in my heart that was not an option. Staying true to my word is imbedded in my moral code.
Yes, by accepting the appointment I zigged when I should have zagged. Caught off balance, I did not take the time to think through my priorities. For the entire next year I sucked-it-up, honored my commitment and performed at my best. Admittedly, it was a huge price to pay. Many of my personal goals were put on hold so I could focus on my role within the organization.
In all honesty, I never regretted the decision to honor my word. In his book “The Four Agreements,” shamanic teacher Don Miguel Ruiz advises to “be impeccable with your word.” I believe there is a huge penalty for not doing so. Certainly we have all been let down by broken promises. Individuals who talk a big game but rarely deliver lose both respect and credibility. When we discover that pattern in a person, we simply stop listening.
Sadly I’ve noticed a movement away from firm assurances. Often upon making a commitment, people offer to call or text to confirm on the day of the engagement. What does that mean? If something better comes up, they may bump you from their schedule? Flexibility is sometimes appropriate, but be aware of the impact staying flexible has on others. Recently two individuals asked me to rearrange someone else’s schedule to accommodate their wishes. They probably did not realize the request implied I should prioritize their schedule over giving my word of commitment to the other parties. Gently and respectfully I declined to do so.
Occasionally life thwarts our ability to keep our word by tripping us up with an emergency. I read once that Oprah, who is a firm believer in honoring commitments, fell ill and had to cancel an important event which, of course, is understandable.
In controllable situations, always keep your word. And don’t bother calling me to confirm, I’ll be there!
